January 28, 2013

Friendship

Interaction is what we're here to have. Synergetic exchange is what life is all about. And, we must not forget that Creation started from Solitude, for Solitude was not enough! Did you know that solitary confinement is one of the most severe punishments and some people would rather choose to die than face this punishment which crushes you from within.

So what do you have to do to have a continuous flourishing interaction with someone? You just need to have a great friendship! Having many friendships are welcome but just one deep friendship can bring you all the joys that come along with it.

Now you may ask, how do I go about having a true friendship? A true one, because obviously you've seen or heard about some fake ones!

Well, first and foremost you have to take the first step. You must be willing to expose who you are to someone. Yes, you have to allow others to know you before they can trust you. You need to come out in the open and express your mind and your feelings to someone, and see how the other reciprocates. Are they opening up to you or is something causing them to remain cold and closed towards you? If they remain closed despite every effort to make them comfortable, you must decide to move on, for if you cannot know a person, you cannot proceed to have a friendship with this person.

Knowing a person is the beginning of friendship, the beginning of developing mutual trust in each other. Showing that you stand for truth and seeing the other either standing along with you or giving it a miss. It doesn't matter if they give a miss to truth, for truth is also in showing your true colours and not in hiding them!

When you have told your stories, when you have expressed the principles you stand for, when you have shown your likes and your dislikes, and when all of these have been received with acceptance, it is then that you come to the deepening of friendship. It is then that you start to love your friend, for the friend accepts you as you are. Now, you want to go out of your way to spend time with your friend and you wish to come closer to each other and become like family. Your trust has now turned into love.

When you become like family you like to share your life like family too. You would like to go shopping together and help each other choose what you desire.  You go for movies, dinner and even holidays together and enjoy each others company. Friendship becomes a companionship!

Then comes the difficult part, the test of strength of a friendship.  A friendship is tested when you need your friends help; when you are down and you need your friend to help you with their effort, time or money, to bring you out of the doldrum you are in. A strong friendship is like Corelle ware, it doesn't break no matter how many times you use it, and a fragile friendship that's just there for show is like expensive China lying in a showcase for the fear of breaking it if you use it! So never be afraid to ask for help when you need it. If a friendship has to break, let it be now, for else it wasn't a true friendship. Every friendship blossoms when you use it in time of need and every life goes through a phase where you need help, sometimes even as an emergency! In fact, giving and receiving is the breath of friendship that keeps it alive and healthy!

If the friendship passes the test of strength, you develop faith in your friend. Faith that they will always be by your side in good times as well as in bad times. And, the more faith you develop the stronger your friendship becomes and you become eternally grateful to your friend.

When you express your gratefulness for the help you receive, your friendship matures. It ripens into what it was meant to be, a delicious fruit for existence! The fruit is when you return a favour done to you, with gratitude, in some form or the other. Existence thrives on interaction and existence longs for some form of exchange. So at the first opportunity, say a thank you, send a gift or just celebrate together in the joy of a strong friendship.

And, always remember, Existence is propelled by a loving relationship into an eternal journey of joy!

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For a deeper understanding of life I recommend the book pictured below
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